in crossroad

In crossroads.

Still I have this big debt. Pussy, my supposed-to-be source of money experienced something unfortunate today that she can't give me the money.. Now I'm in trouble. My brother, with his bitter and angry sentiments about money has been bugging me. I should have asked for 6k instead of 2k. Now, I'm in trouble. I asked another close friend but then he has to asked if his parents will allow him to lend me, and it sucks.. I mean, I don't want to cause trouble to anybody specially ofcourse to him..I'm the one who needs money and if he's gonna be in trouble or at least get himself caught in between then I guess not worth it.. Haaay

Got a good interview although its totally wrong for me to react to the whole lecture with a selfish word such as "exhausting!".. Gosh I was soooo damn wrong about that. I hope 'she' didn't note that (which is totally impossible). Another thing when she asked me to described myself in one word, I should've said what my preliminary interviewer told us: "Ambitious".. Instead I answered driven.. Hay I forgot about that dahil linakad ko ang buong ayala!!!!

Now I'm in crossroads between waiting for my since-college dream company and this emerging nothing-at-all-to-do-with-my-course-but-has-spectacular-benefits-including-travel-and-management company.. Aaaargh what should I do? The second is a dream job for anyone in the country. The benefits and career growth is very promising but sales and marketinG????? However my dream company has very little career growth, what I'll be doing is perfect for my course but the ambition of becoming a manager will remain in my dreams... I'm not as confident as my colleagues with regards to programming etc..

But then, in both companies, I'm subjected to intensive training...
Whatever training I will be enrolled in, I know, sure fire, I will excell...

Still at crossroads... advice please!

words to ponder:
a.Rest and relaxation; travel opportunities; management trainee; makati; benefits; PAYCHECK; partner; 800k; immediate hiring!

b.Computer; how things work; DREAM company; mr. soya; techy; queen of circle; fun fun; pressure; makati;

Words to curse:
a. sales and marketing!; promo girl?; rejection; degrading!!; eewness

b. programming hell; no career growth; stuck; geeky?; no fashion hallway