best isn't always enough

"wow. dami mo pala activity this week. dami mo album" - mars

Only now that I realized, he was right.. it was just one week. I felt though that its not.. Bum-ness. I'm resting bago sumabak ulit.. Clear stuffs in my mind and then go workin. I consider it my preparation before I step into a new commitment. :)

Been to Laffline. They're so funny, but then I can't laugh my heart out thinkin about the subject of my previous post. But things get better now, I'm being more mature. He should be too.. Move forward!! You're the source of motivation! I know I'm not perfect, I don't even know if my administration was successful.. All I know is that I did the best possible I could given the constraints. If there was any other president-iable better than me at that time, I would not accept the position.. All I know at that time was that I love the org so much, I could not let it die! If taking the position if the one thing I can do to save it, then I will! I'll learn, I'll find motivation, I'll guide and I'll give the best despite my other commitments.. It just turns out that my best wasn't enough.

sudden fall

After talking with president-to-be, bigla akong nanghina...ginisa daw sila sa accred.. and I can't do anything about it.. ayoko manisi, but I guess the blame's on me. Now I reflect, we did the same thing with what the last year has done to us... I feel down... kulang pa...

First official bum day

Bum account #1? haha

I never quite recovered yet from the 'drama' yesterday... I thought I will not graduate because of a 0.0 in Micposy. I left at home yesterday uber badtrip then when I got to school nalaman ko na bagsak pa ako. For someone who knew me very well I'll tell you 'Imagine the drama!' I'm really really serious during course card distribution days from frosh till the last. And I can say this is the worst ever. I don't even want to think about all the tension from yesterday, it still creeps me out. Maybe that's why di ko pa naffeel na graduate na ako. All I want to remember and I know will never leave my memory ever was that my two friends were there from start to finish. Sobrang thank you! I don't know what will happen to me if you guys weren't there promise! I feel I'm on the verge of breaking down specially when I'm thinking about what happened earlier in our home. But since you guys were there and never left me alone all along, I managed to be strong, reasonable and composed still. I don't want to mention names but since what you've done is very big for me, I want to send my biggest thank you and my warmest hug to Boogie and Nate :) And of course toFing, whom I've been talking about the 'drama' after I got my much deserved 1.0, thanks too.. and to my ece_Mpg who I think has no idea :P mwaaa

They wanted to go to the movie for the three of us but I said I'd rather treat for dinner basta kumpleto naman.. I mean, I don't want to ditch the guy who give me such incredible support in my low point.. I want us to be together at the end of the day :)

Uber camwhore moments @ MOA.. 300+ photos?! cmon! Ate at La Mesa Grill.. Busog! :)

Yess for my first official bum day, I want to keep up with a lot of things.. One on the list is this blog :P

in denial trauma

This is usually the time where I put the necessary "regimens" on my face then turn on the TV and watch till I fall asleep. But now, after hearing the song "Cry" by Mandy Moore and "Home" by Daughtry, I felt the sadness. Being in denial is always my sakit. I can't believe that I'm approaching yet another end. More than the academics, the school and the professors, I know whom I will surely miss and that's why I'm so scared. I'm afraid of facing that day.. that END day! It's just like hours away.. and I promise myself that I would cry really really really hard when I would be facing it on my own. The faces that keep running on my mind are the people whom I can't believe I would ever meet and be this close with. I'm not that worried with OC or my IE group, because definitely I will see them again. But ECE.. it's just hard to swallow...

Last year about the same period of the year, I was very much like this. And I remember crying in the van going to my work after hearing songs that my memory somehow attached to them. But that was just 4 months of attachment. Talk about 3-4 years! Although I'm in denial of being in denial.. I know, My day will come someday... The day where I'll probably shout and cry it all out. What I'm not sure is when.. I hope it might not come earlier like Coursecard. My friends both from OC and ECE knows deeply how much I hate talking about the 'end'.. Wish ko lang makayanan ko ang tuksuhan sa coursecard.... Sometimes, I really appear strong, but I know I'm just kidding myself not to expose my weak side. Haaay..

Here I am again, keeping myself busy, not wanting to be alone, planning trips.. my own escape. my 'in denial' stage. oh End is my worst fear..

Who am I kidding?! The crying might even start tonight, unless kulang pa ang pagod at antok na binigay ko sa sarili ko para di na umabot sa "Thinking and reminiscing mode" before I go to sleep.. Tell me.. Am I pathetic? much I guess..


Now, may pahabol pa na song.. Faraway amp!! I don't want this night to the start.. shocks!! I'm very easily affected by that song.. sobra. wanted to text them at this very hour.. but then it'll just show them how much pain I've been hiding as if they don't know it.. I think they're just waiting for me to breakdown.. and yes I will soon.. very sooon... and I'm teary eyed.. God help me.

I love you guys so much!!! sooooo much!! I wanted to hug you before we go on our own ways... I really do but doing that might cause my tears to fall.. Love you

galaw galaw

my gaaaaaaaaaad!!! Just watched the full video of kanto boy's galaw galaw hahaha.. so Jologs but my gad I'm such a big fan of John Lloyd na! Uber kulit nila. Btw I also love Vhong and Billy ever since dahil uber galing talaga nila sumayaw!

Hay nako! John Lloyd ang gwapo mo talaga! Si Luis naman uber ganda ang katawan! muzzles and cuts! Billy galing pa rin talga sumayaw, gusto ko ung mga 'ballerina' moves niya!waaaaaaaaa pati c vhong! ang wacky wacky wacky talaga nila! ibig ba sabihin fan na ako ng kanto boys? haha 3/4 gusto ko e... not bad! :) i have the biggest grin

currently watching underage.. underage bitches haha interesting

ojt report

naalala mu ung table of contents ng final report mu?
ginawa kac ni miss *Advise na sample final report sa min ung sau


Wow nattouch naman ako dun! haha bonggang-bongga kasi ung report ko nun e! :)
Print all you can! Plus nilagay ko pa ung mga HR stuffs like exit form, pati evaluation.. haaaay

the forum night

Again, this is a day to remember. A day marked as assurance that we Pro3 students really surpassed our thesis! Haaay.. but then again, I don't feel as relieved. Maybe because, we finished the thesis earlier or many other things happen this day. Well, at first I was really pissed that my thesismates left me the moment they saw the students entering our exhibit room. C'mon!! Takot kayo sa tao?? May usapan ba na ako ang magsasalita.. In a split second, literally they were gone. Sobrang nakakabadtrip talaga! Literal, nagtatago sila!! Grabe, I'm just so glad this will be all over very soon. That way, hindi ko na mararamdaman ang mga nakoooooooooooooo. Haaay nako talaga!!!Buti na lang dumating sila pussy. Sobrang buti na lang!! I felt quite relieved!! "..pabayaan mo na yun!" she told me!

Then I transfered back to 116, got a hold of myself with the help of my friends. Do a little camwhoring with no less than the camwhore himself, Boogie! haha Thanks to pokemon for the shots! haha.. Then lunch treat (c/o Ms. Advise) at Yellowcab, ate four pizzas with half a serving of pasta. Talked about our course's program and curriculum and study habits etc. More like an 'exit interview'... I didn't talked much cause I'm still pissed then I don't like to gather any form of attention. So many ideas to share, but the timing is not just right! (I'm still quite pissed).. Konting reactions lang. Kahit na sports pa ung topic, na forteng forte ko! Plus ung mga org issues na isa pang gustong gusto ko talaga pakeelaman.

Then we head back to our beloved building, superior man asked me to do his introduction in his trademark way na sobrang naisip ko na buti na lang talaga matatapos na tong term na to!! Grrrr.. !@##$ Anyway, as the forum goes on, I took pictures of our superior man presenting and Boogie. Nagflash pa naman ung camera ko! Kala ko papalabasin ako. Bawal ata! During Boogie's term, tawa ako ng tawa.. feeling ko kasi parang dine-dare lang cya ni Recycla. Lalo na ung "There you Go!" hahaha

Next, we went two rooms away from the forum. Without any plans, unspoken words were already in our mind read as "Eto na ung moment!" Through much much much much much combined efforts from me, Recycla, pussy and all those who cries 'peace on earth'... Finally!!!! as in Finally talaga!! nagkaaayos na.. Tried so hard to resist my tears from falling.. Sobrang naiiyak ako sa moment na yun lalo na pag nakikita ko pa ung isa na umiiyak...tas si Recycla din.... Haaay So loved that moment! It just proves that our friendship became stronger talaga. We were able to surpass that stage! Imagine, we thought hindi na talaga pwede. Even time throw them (and us na rin) apart.. Pero still we made it.. Baka ganun talaga pag barkada. Kahit wala ng salita, kahit hindi ikaw yung 'subject', you would still feel the loss, and with this loss you just hope and aim that everything will be alright soon!! Mag step-up na ang dapat magstep-up, makielam na! Aaaaw how sweeeeeeeeeeeeet!! Love you guys!! overnyt a

Finally, some makeup session then supercamwhoring again sa strc then Moa. Ate at Kenny Rogers then Libot.. Finally everythings ok for us..

My world is starting to turn without me noticing.. Soon I will face my greatest fear-- the End. waaaaaa ayoko muna isipin. Sa sobrang stressed ko tonight ( to the fact na kelangan pa akong icheer ni ate condo, partner and Boogie dahil naiiyak na ako) iseselective memory ko na muna!

*Sobrang thanks kay partner.. oo magppamper muna ako tom, I'm so happy kasi we can still talk katulad ng dati.. Walang nagbago :) Jan ka pa rin.. sinasaktuhan mo lagi ung emo moments ko :p

*Kay Boogie na nagsabing "ngaun ka ba bibtaw... dati nga ikaw pa naguuplift ng spirit namin e" aaaaaaw.. So happy talaga para sa power thesis nyo!! di ko pa naeexpress ng sobra sobra!! finally! gusto ko kayo ihug ng super higpit isa isa!!!! powerhug?! nakiki-sara G! :P

*Kay ate condo for "im proud of u my favorite cousin" aaaaaaaaw fave din kita sobra! hehe miss you!

want to hit the slack so badly

haaay...probably my final days in comlab and yet I was caught playing Restaurant city. I can't help it. I loved the game. i love food so much both eating and cooking, so this game is just so for me! yey! finally I found an application in facebook where I might not make sawa haha conyo much?!

I'm really looking forward to hit the slack! I want to pursue my other passions. Lalo na sa cooking and gaming :)

Cooking:
*I want to download the whole series of Naked Chef and Oliver Twist. Plus Take Home Chef (Curtis Stone) and Food Safari... haaay Heaven!! :)
**I want to cook cook cook and eat eat eat.. I miss shabu-shabu sooo much!!
***My thesismates and some of my classmates together with our thesis advisers dine last night at Saisaki/Dad's Megamall. And I was not happy.. Haay waste of money(even if I didn't pay).. If someone wants to go for the volume ok.. pero it really was not good. I'd rather eat a little portion of a single but sumptuous appetizer than eat a complete meal of unlimited servings that doesn't tickle my taste buds at all.. I hate the Japanese Foods there when in fact I'm a fan of this cuisine. so not sulit. For 500+ I'd pick shabu-shabu talaga! At least dun, ikaw pa nagluluto ng food mo.. You just have to pick the freshest ingredients :)
***Nakakagutom!

Gaming:
* Sobrang tagal ko ng nagtitiis na maglaro ng The Sims. Inabutan na ako ng The Sims 3! Haay I just know that I will be really really addicted to that once I installed it! Gosh gusto ko na laruin!!!
** PS2 RPG. I would like to kill kill and kill infinite number of zombies, dinos and monsters! Missed the Dino Crisis 3 days and Resident Evils! Let me taste that flesh! haha (Pero sigaw naman ako ng sigaw pag naglalaro...Feel na Feel!!) I also miss the RPG quests type wherein magical beings and supernatural powers come to life! aaaaaaargh :((
***I'm also itching to race against my brothers and cousins sa mga 'chocobo stuffs' before! haha and o I miss bike mice ba un.. basta super old school na racing plus may powers! haaaaaaay Nintendo days

Adventure:
* Of course I want to explore the whole of Philippines! gandaaaaa but pahinga muna siguro.. I still feel burnt out after OC trips.. But I would certainly be listing the places I want to go...
**I also want to do extreme sports! Want to try wakeboarding, surfing and white water rafting. Gusto ko rin ng Sky diving.
***In the laaatest future(meaning di pa ngayon, burnt talaga and bad knee) I want to dig back in to extreme adventures - spelunking, rock climbing and a lot more...


Haay with all these plans will not be met if I don't prepare for it right! How? Complete all the school requirements muna!!! kaya yan!! just get a good nice sleep and then pump up the beat!!